The city of San Francisco is being stalked by a huge shaved vampyre cat named Chet, and only I, Abby Normal, emergency back-up mistress of the great Bay Area night, and my mangahaired love monkey, Foo Dog, stand between the ravenous monster and a bloody massacre of the general public.

Whoa. And this is a love story? Yup. See, while some lovers were born to run, Jody and Tommy were born to bite. Well, reborn, that is, now that they're vampires. Good thing theirs is an undying love, since they're imprisoned in a bronze statue. Their Goth Girl Friday, Abby Normal, wants to be a bloodsucking fiend, too, but right now she's really busy with other stuff like Chet, who's getting bigger and smarter—and thirstier—by the minute.

Before you can say "OMG! WTF?" Tommy and Jody are sprung from captivity, and join forces with Abby and the entire crew to hunt big cat and save the city. And that's when the fun really begins.